As hard as I may try to break out of my mortal cage, I seem to fall back into the realities that are my human limitations. Don’t get me wrong, I do not have any expectations nor even and interest in living past my prescribed days, but I do wish to transcend the imperfection that comes with mortality. Now, I’m not making any higher power allusions, I’m simply admitting that and stewing over how I am human and therefore flawed. And the problem isn’t even that I can’t be perfect, but rather that I fall prisoner to the habits and tendencies that I already see as being a problem.
Living a life for others or at least for the approval of others is a ridiculous and unproductive choice of life style. But that’s the point isn’t it? It isn’t as much of a choice as we should like to think, At least not one that is done in terrifically conscious manner. I try to tell myself that I don’t care what people think, that I don’t want respect, or that I require others to make me happy; but I still pretend to be a little “cooler” so people will like me a little more. I still worry about what people really think of me, do they think I’m cool? Do they respect me? Does anyone actually want to have me? I still require support from people even when I should be strong enough on my own.
I want to tell people that I’m excited about something and get the response that their happy for me, yet I find I am being shrugged off as a second thought or being “reminded” of the realities of life. I think back to being a prisoner to the practical world. Ok, so here are my contentions:
1.If you notice someone is excited, just remember,
even in the midst of realities they need to be aware of, they also need, sometimes more, someone to be happy for them (yes this is only the warning of a tragically over emotional nobody; however, there are plenty of emotional nobodies in this world)
even in the midst of realities they need to be aware of, they also need, sometimes more, someone to be happy for them (yes this is only the warning of a tragically over emotional nobody; however, there are plenty of emotional nobodies in this world)
2. Don’t get caught up in the practicalities of life, sometimes they suck the smiles out of life
3. The most important: if you're a loser who is hyper aware of your surroundings even after you have strived to overcome such tendencies (cough, cough) take a second to take inventory a second…third…seventh…hundredth time and remember this life is one you can’t live with fear or anxiety…it will only hurt you
Music: heres a little good ol' high quality covering. purple for a splash of change
the shins cover of we will become silhouettes: amazing
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